Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
