What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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