If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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