so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
