worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
