Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
