i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
