you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
