Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Randomize
