This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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