I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
