Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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