i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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