Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
How external is "for external use only"?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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