I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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