I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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