i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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