Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
