so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Randomize
