I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
