ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Randomize
