Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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