We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
