Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
