What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I just found a bag of teeth...
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Randomize
