we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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