You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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