This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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