I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
