She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Randomize
