There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
