I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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