who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
