anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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