Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
