I just pynch a tree in the face
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
