i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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