My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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