Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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