My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Randomize
