oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
