I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
