You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
