did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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