I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
