Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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