So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
