I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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