do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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