her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
